Sunday, July 13, 2008

Investing in Alathia Update

For those of you who are wondering how I've been doing with Ali lately I will say that it has been a really good week. We still have our clashes and there have been a couple of times where I've lost control of my emotions but for the most part, once I committed to making this a priority, I've noticed myself being more careful in the way I talk to her and about her. I have found it a lot harder than I thought to implement some of the ideas I had for spending time with her due to this last's week schedule. The tea party I was anxious to have with her hasn't happened yet and everytime I'm cooking it seems she is off riding her bike or playing outside. *Little confession: I also try not to cook much these days so that limits her being able to help out too!
However, swimming is still going for another week and I DID take her on a fun mother-daughter date today. I let her choose whatever flavor ice-cream she wanted at the TCBY in the gas station and she picked Rainbow. Then we headed to the park where she ran around and played and I watched her and pushed her on her favorite swing. She had so much fun and all day she was talking about how she was going to go on a "date" with Mama. I definitely will have to make these special times together happen frequently, especially with a new little one taking up a lot of my time and attention in the future.
Just trying something a little new together and having some relaxing time to chat without other responsibilities pressing really helped me to focus on what a beautiful and special little girl I have and filled me with gratitude for the treasure she is in our lives.
I've been making an effort to include Ali in more hugs and cuddle time and keep things fair with the kids and making sure she knows I love her lots. Jer is still more prone to cuddling for long periods of time but now if she's in the room I make sure to invite her to join in and she hasn't been too bad about wiggling or hurting me this week.
While we still keep busy with friends and pool parties in the yard to cool off I'm finding myself slowing down in the activities I do and looking for the easy options. I don't walk or bike nearly as much now and I take advantage of every opportunity to get a free meal (my folks have been in a grilling mood lately and often make extras and invite us over much to my delight!) and to avoid housework like dishes at all costs! I try to shop without the kids now as it's just too exhausting, especially since they never fail to throw screaming fits in Safeway for some reason (no other stores, just Safeway!) Slowing down and not trying to do too much really help me stay less irritable during this stage of pregnancy, which in turn helps me deal with Ali in a more Christ-like manner.
One funny Ali story:
Perhaps Ali will work in the Justice system someday. After all, she absolutely understands right and wrong. She DEMANDS what she has earned. What am I talking about? Well, on the way to Grammy's one night she hollered in the car, "Now, don't you forget my two spanks!" She reminded me when we got to Grammy's to give them to her right away much to Grammy's amazement. We had been at a pool party before leaving for Grammy's and she had hit her best friend over the head with a kickboard, as well as not obeying when I said it was time to leave. She knew that she had been wrong and deserved consequences and knowing how forgetful Mama is during pregnancy, she demanded that I remember to give them to her and get them over with! The same scenario happened the night before too when she sternly told me, "You get yourself into that kitchen and you get the spanking spoon and give me my spanks RIGHT NOW!" I was speechless. I was shocked that she was ordering me around in such a bossy tone (like mother, like daughter?) but even more shocked that she would ORDER me to spank her! Isn't parenthood something?


SamAndHisFam said...

I think what you're doing is awesome by investing in Ali and I am trying to do the same thing with Aubrie. It's funny how we can sometimes clash with our firstborn girls and I know I need to work harder on hugging Aubrie, cuddling her, telling her I love her, and spending time with just her. Keep up the good work and that is quite hilarious that Ali didn't let you forget those spankings!
P.S. The other day, I came out of my bedroom after getting dressed and Kayley looked at me and said, "Nice shirt, Mom!" Sam and I cracked up. It sounded so funny coming out of a minerature almost two year old. She now says it quite often when I wear that same shirt and I'm sure she picked that line up from her sister at some point.

sbpaulson said...

You are doing a great job Lindsey! She will definitely look back on those times with fond memories!

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