Appreciating the Grass You Have

The other day some friends and I were chatting about husbands and gifts.  It seems that a lot of husbands out there like to lavish humongous gifts upon their wives.  Huge bouquets of roses, fancy exercise equipment, large, elaborate homes, new vehicles, electronic gadgets, exotic vacations, diamond jewelry, dates at nice restaurants, etc.

Being that gifts are one of my love languages (with chocolate being my main love language *teehee*), a part of me sighed and thought inside, "That would be so nice!  If my husband was into giving me gifts like that I'd already have my nice camera that I've been working so hard for and saving for months to buy."

I also felt myself wondering.

Is my worth found in the number or cost of gifts given?

Of course my head knows the correct answer. 

No.

But sometimes in our culture of idolatry, where celebrities are exalted and money is treasured above all else by so many around us, it can be easy to think so.

Where many friends spent thousands on engagement rings, mine cost $130.

Where some gals got to go to exotic restaurants for their first date, our first date ever, as in my first date with my first ever boyfriend, who is now my husband, was at Burger King.

Does this mean I'm not worth more than that?

The conversation went on, and I told them that my husband was the kind of guy who will only pay cash for what he buys me.

Surprisingly, everyone began saying,

"I wish my husband was like that!"

  "I wish we were debt free!"

  "I wish I didn't have to get the huge credit card bill at the end of the month

after my hubby has splurged on me."

So, it would seem that everything is a trade-off.

You may have a husband who likes to go all out and treat you like a princess.

But you'll feel the pinch financially.

You may have a husband who doesn't splurge at all. 

But you'll feel secure in knowing there's money to pay the bills.

What if the way my husband shows me love is in being careful with our money so that I can stay home and not have to worry how we're going to pay the bills?  What if the way he shows me love is in seeing that our needs are taken care of first and saving for emergencies? 

What if the sacrifices that seem small to the world are huge to him, when he grew up eating out at McDonalds about once a year?

I'm thankful for the ways my frugal hubby shows me love. 

He may have only spent $6 on me for Valentine's day but he picked out a snack and movie rental that I would like, gave me a little box of conversation hearts and a lovely handmade Valentine with sweet little somethings written on it.  He often gives me shoulder rubs and neck massages and helps put the kids to bed.  And because he is so tight with money and careful, we have food to eat, a roof over our heads, heat in the winter, life insurance, water, health coverage, and money to share with those in need.  This is far more than most people in the world have and I don't deserve a bit of it, or the love he shows me each and every day.

And as I've been saving for a nice camera, he's been doing hours and hours of research for me, even though he isn't into photography, because he wants me to get the best possible deal. I was going to go with the cheapest model but he's convinced I need to get the best deal for the money and spend a little more to get twice the camera. He's planning to give me some tax refund money to help out my own savings and he wants to buy me a nicer lens than I would have gotten for myself.

The world tempts me to believe that worth is found in material expressions of love or amount or cost of posessions.  But I have a husband who doesn't "buy" that.  He shows me old-fashioned, honest, sacrificial love.

I'm blessed!

The grass may look greener on the other side, but I know that it's not.  I have the yard that is just right for me and I'm thankful for it!

Love

Life is hard.

Love is hard.

In nearly 8 years of marriage we have weathered so much.

Disagreements.

Disappointments.

Disillusionment.

Job upheavals and uncertainties.

Financial difficulties.

Family problems.

Church issues.

4 minor car accidents

 (7 if you count the times people hit our parked cars)

65 hours of labor.

14 months of all-day nausea.

6 moves.

Several deaths in the family.

Screaming toddlers.

Fighting kids.

Tragedies among our friends and loved ones.

Friends moving away.

Splintered friendships.

3.5 years of lost sleep (with more months of this to come)

Illnesses.

Injury.

Surgeries.

Angry words.

Exhaustion and Stress.

And yet....

We've seen so many good times too.

First looks at four little faces.

First giggles and steps.

Parenting together.

Praying together.

Laughter, fun, and sunshine.

Fireworks.

Delight.

Passion.

Supporting hugs.

Meals with great friends.

Mommy's little helpers.

Daddy's girls.

Little boy kisses.

Vacations and camping.

A child's prayer for salvation.

Massaging out the fatigue.

Singing, dancing, little children.

Making up.

Hope.

Coming together.

Dreams coming true.

God's provision.

Forgiveness.

Good health.

The love of family.

More than enough.

Reconciliation.

Church growth.

Loved ones finding new life in Christ.

God's strength when we have none of our own left.

New neighbors.

New friends and old friends.

First home.

Healing.

Being best friends.

A comfortable love.

This Valentine's Day I'm remembering.   I'm weighing out our days together and I am thankful.

There is no one else I'd rather be doing this life with.

Date Night

I like to dance.  Be it country swing, line dancing, waltzing, or whatever, I enjoy it.  That's not to say I'm any good or that I know what I'm doing.  But that doesn't stop me.

Upon getting married, I was excited to finally have a dance partner.  After years of choosing not to date around and not going to High School dances, etc. I thought this was my chance!  But alas, my husband does not like to dance!  I did get him to attend a homeschool ball in MT with my relatives once when Ali was a baby and I can usually get him to do one dance with me at a wedding, but he is very stubborn about the subject.  I usually end up dancing with my dad or one of my kids.

So, I was delighted to discover this weekend that although he absolutely will not dance with me in public, Josiah will dance at home!  After beating me at Yahtzee, he let me choose how I wanted to be served (thanks to my poor-loser attitude and the fact that he wins most board games we play we came up with the rule a decade ago that whoever wins has to serve the loser in some way, like doing a chore for them, giving them a massage, etc.) 

I chose dancing around the living room to Sinatra.  We pulled the blinds lest the neighbors be out on a cold, winter night peeping through the windows, turned the lights down low, put on an internet radio channel for Sinatra and Louis Armstrong and had a blast!  And because we live with 4 little people, make that 4 MESSY, little people, we danced upon Duplo blocks and little socks, and tried not to trip over toys and dress-ups strewn about. 

We've always had a Friday night "date night in" to watch movies together but this year one of my goals is to spice up Date Night a little bit.  To get out of the rut of just watching movies together, although we enjoy a good movie.  If anyone has any bright ideas, please share them with me!  Watching a good friend's marriage fall apart has made me realize how blessed I am and how much I don't want to take my marriage for granted.

Sweet!

Sometimes the deepest love is seen in the little things. This post really warmed my heart today. I wanted to link to it, not to make you jealous of my friend Natalie's hubby, but to inspire you to likewise do the little things for your spouse to ease their burden and bless them abundantly. I know I often forget to do little things to show love to my spouse and often take his many thoughtful gestures and kindnesses to me for granted! I need to be more proactive, like Steve, about letting my spouse know he is one of my top priorities!

Look What God Did---The Big Thirty!!!

Being goofy last New Year's Day. Maybe they'd had one two many dips into the chocolate fondue pot?

Thanks to my sis-in-law Anna (pictured above with Dad and Colter) for most of these great photos!

Today marks a very momentous day in my family. Thirty years ago today, my folks, Allen and Cindy, said their vows in a mountain meadow next to my mom's family's cabin, with all of their family and friends watching.

Many of those thirty years were very tough as they struggled with their differences and hurts; Dad carved out his own furniture business from the ground up, Mom raised three kids without much help. There were family losses and trials and the day-in, day-out difficulty of just paying the bills and reconciling different family backgrounds. A couple of times in my childhood things got so tough in their relationship that they were separated for a short time. It was hard on us kids to hear them fighting.

Things weren't too bad in high school and the many activities that come with having teens kept my folks fairly busy. But when their two oldest kids left home, all of a sudden a lifetime of hurt escalated into what we thought was the end. What my Mom and Dad didn't realize at the time is that they were on the crazy cycle and they didn't know how to get off and were so weary from years of fighting. Dad was unloving because he felt disrespected and Mom was disrespectful because she felt unloved. The cycle was too ingrained in their lives to stop it, so they thought, and they couldn't live in it any longer, especially as Christians, whose marriages are supposed to model the love Jesus has for His people. They felt like their marriage was the ultimate hypocrisy.

Meanwhile, I was in my second year of marriage and carrying our first child. My parents final separation drove me to tears many a night and I continually felt caught in the middle of their anger towards one another. As I considered my first child's coming birth, it was devastating to imagine having to take the baby to multiple grandparent's homes and to think of dealing with the possibility of them remarrying or being bitter, etc.

I often listened to Focus on the Family broadcasts while I cleaned house and one day they had Emerson Eggerich on talking about his new book, Love and Respect. I felt God nudging me to buy it for them. My parents had been reading tons of books and were counseling with a pastor, but nothing had gotten through to them yet.

Mom ended up swinging by the house to get the mail at Dad's house and found the book first. She took it to her place she was renting and read it. She was blown away! She was excited that Dad was going to read it next and since it came from me, instead of her, he was more receptive to reading it.

It's hard to say exactly what happened next, except that God used this book to open their eyes to their sin and to show them why they were constantly having problems. It was the 2x4 they needed across their foreheads. Dad was hit with the message that no matter how disrespectful your wife is, you must love her unconditionally. Mom was hit with the "new concept" which is rarely, if ever taught, even in churches, that a wife must respect her husband unconditionally, even if she feels he hasn't earned it. They both were amazed to realize the differences between men and women (he speaks blue, she speaks pink, he has blue hearing aids, she has pink hearing aids, etc.) and the ways that men and women can better understand each other and show love and respect to one another, as the Bible commands.

What a joy it was, just 2 weeks before Alathia Joy was born when my parents reunited and my Mom moved back home. My Dad's Men's Bible Study group was so happy for them, they offered to clean the log house top to bottom with him in preparation for her homecoming. If you know my Dad and how messy he is, you will realize what an awesome gift that was! I don't think he used the dishwasher once in the entire 3 months he lived alone! He mainly subsisted off of Campbell's Chunky soup and elk steaks. Those godly guys had the place sparkling for Mom and shortly thereafter both of my folks came out to Minnesota to visit their first new grandchild. We ended up moving back to Wyoming later that year when Ali was a baby.

Ever since God saved my parent's marriage through the book, Love and Respect, I have seen a major difference in both of them. Dad is much gentler, Mom is more respectful, and both of them speak well of the other and seem to enjoy one another's company, which are things that were absent throughout my growing up years. They are free to be the fun people they truly are now that the stress and tension of marital dissatisfaction is gone and they are facing and dealing with their own sin and pride. They have counseled at least 4 couples in trouble in the last few years, and have used the Love and Respect DVDs and book to show couples how to get off the crazy cycle and start living Biblically in their marriage. Our church and their church have hosted several Love and Respect Bible Studies and numerous copies have made their way around our town.

My kids get to visit Grammy and Boppa's house and see them enjoying a life together, and my brother and I have been encouraged to guard ourselves against making the mistakes our folks did in our own young marriages. My parents hope to continue to minister to couples in trouble throughout their lives and to continue passing out the book Love and Respect.

This week, upon hearing that they will have a 30 year anniversary, many folks are saying, "Congratulations! You made it! What an accomplishment! You've done good!"

But we know better!

My parents and I know that if God hadn't intervened they would have been divorced long ago. It is only the grace of God, His amazing work in their lives, that has preserved their marriage and blessed it! It is only by God's grace that any of us succeed in marriage or experience joy in this life!

If you are struggling in your marriage, I highly recommend you read the book Love and Respect and if possible, attend the conference, which I hear is wonderful. The movie Fireproof, which portrays a marriage in trouble and how the gospel can change people, is incredible. Watch it!

Join me in praising the Lord today that my parents are still married! They will celebrate their anniversary by going on a backcountry pack trip on horseback for a few days. Freezing mountain temps at night, the possibility of snow, the threat of Grizzly Bears, having to dig out your own toliet, and being many miles from the nearest vehicle isn't my idea of a good time, but they both love extreme wilderness camping and will have fun!

The Joy of Spontaneity

I'm usually not a spontaneous person. I like to have a plan. It doesn't always have to be on paper but I like having an idea of what's going to happen in advance so I can prepare.

Yesterday my hubby came home at lunch and asked if I'd like to go with him to Rock Springs in an hour and a half. My dad, who is his employer, needed him to pick up a snowmobile hood there that had been ordered through a company that had stopped delivering to our town.

Normally, I would have said no because the idea of spending four hours in the car with 3 little ones 3 and under, making bottles and nursing in a van, and driving over the scary, curvy, ice-covered roads of South Pass is not my idea of fun. However, when my hubby mentioned we could spend time together, go shopping at a mall, and eat out with our old CEF friend Colin, I agreed. I quickly got together gazillions of stuff (since traveling light isn't a wise idea with tiny tots) and we hopped in the van for an adventure.

The roads weren't too bad although there were a couple of points when King Jo said I sounded like I was in labor, huffing and puffing in short little breaths, trying not to imagine the van sliding off a precipice. We found the snowmobile hood, and headed to JC Penney, a huge treat for us considering we haven't even been in a mall for a year and a half! I had given King Jo some money for Christmas to buy a new sweater and he found a great one. Most of their clothes were 70% off and I snagged a few new sweaters and shirts too. It's been over 2 years since we've been in a Christian bookstore and it was fun to browse the super tiny one in the mall there. I even found an XL Bible case for my new ESV Study Bible!

We had an enjoyable dinner catching up with Colin over yummy Mexican food. After supper we shopped a little more and then headed home. Justus even nursed really well during a gas stop and the other kids did great too, sleeping most of the 2 hours there and the 2 hours home. Can you believe we actually drove past a Walgreens and didn't stop? It was tempting, but I didn't know what the deals for the week were anyway and I knew we should focus on the stores we normally can't go to, and not try to do too much in one night. On the drive home King Jo and I discussed our goals for the new year and areas of spiritual and character growth we want to work on (I'll post on these soon.)

All in all, I discovered it wasn't so bad to be spontaneous and it is TOTALLY possible even with three little ones 3 and under! And I discovered our heating vent in the van works well to heat bottles up for my very particular son who gets as mad as a little wet hornet if his milk is a degree too hot or too cold. So, the first day of my "nursing vacation" ended up being way different than I expected, but was still an enjoyable time!

Hubby Questionaire

Have you ever received one of those e-mail questionaires that you fill out so that your friends can get to know you better? Sometimes it is disappointing to see how lame the questions are. Do we really need to know what color of shirts our friends are wearing? How about some questions with substance that get to the heart?



I decided to create my own questionaire to send to my hubby to get to know him even better than I already do. Feel free to copy this post and paste into an e-mail to send to your hubby!



1. If you could take me on a weekend getaway anywhere in the world, where would that be?

2. What is one food you hope I never make for supper?

3. How can I pray for you this week?

4. What is one outfit that comes to mind that you particularly like seeing me in?

5. What is one sport or activity you have always wanted to try but haven't yet?

6. What candy reminds you of your childhood?

7. If you had a million dollars to give away who would you give it to?

8. How did your mom comfort you when you had a bad dream?

9. What is your best Christmas memory from your childhood?

10. What will be the next book you read?

11. Do you like nailpolish on me? How about toenail polish?

12. What's one snack you could never get enough of?

13. What movie do you wish we could star in together?

14. What is one character quality you would like to see me work on?

15. Black or red lingerie? Lacey or sheer?

16. What is something I have done this week that has blessed you?

17. If you could snap your fingers and make a "big toy" appear what would it be? ATV, boat, snowmobile, etc.?

18. What is something God is teaching you right now?

19. What song best describes your personality?

20. Does our home feel comfortable to you? If not, what would help?

21. What room of the house do you especially like to see looking very clean?

22. What's one game you wish we played together more often?

23. Describe a relaxing vacation in 5 words.

24. Who would you like to have over for dinner next?

25. What favorite nickname do you like me to call you?

An En Gedi Bedroom #2

Inspired by Heather's work on her bedroom, I decided to clean up our majorly messy bedroom and re-arrange this weekend. My husband was gone logging so it was very challenging to move the bed myself, but I love the results. Our bed used to be up against the window, leaving a little room on either side that quickly got piled up with junk and clutter. I cleaned out our closet and was able to stash a lot of things in our bedroom in the newly organized closet. The view from the entryway. I made the wild curtains (out of a huge wrap-around-skirt in tropical print) when we first moved in. Justus has his little bassinet in the corner, with a baby quilt I made a few years ago hanging behind for his "baby corner." He's starting to sleep mostly in his bassinet at night and sometimes naps there too.

My corner. I have to be very careful what I put on my nightstand since Jer naps on our bed and will reach over and get into stuff sometimes. Eventually I would like to re-paint this little dresser a different color. It was a yard sale find a few years ago and now holds baby things. It's hard to see from the pic but I have a couple of little posters on the wall ( a mom kneeling in prayer and a name plaque with a verse). The pillow was a gift from my mom. She made lots of little pillows out of an antique, family heirloom quilt and gave a pillow to all of the granddaughters and great-granddaughters.

The junkiest, most cluttered part of our room is a couple of feet beyond the foot of our bed. This is what it looks like straightened up! Because of our tight quarters, I couldn't get it any neater as I store my craft things, our bills and important papers, file our mail, store our books, our cards and art supplies, and all my medicine freebies from Walgreens here. This is our pantry and "office" and paper/art cabinet rolled into one. The large basket is filled with kid's books and we need to keep it out of little fingers' reach so the books are kept intact. We have some sturdy board books we let the kids keep in their room but this is how we maintain our nice books. The white smudge on the dark dresser is actually from when King Jo was a little boy and covered the dresser in stickers!

In order to break up the dull monotony of the really dark, oppressive walls, I hung this lacey, sage-green shower curtain behind the bed. I was using it in our living room but took it down to brighten up the living room a bit. It was a Wal-Mart clearance rack find. The imitation-down quilt is soft and poofy and was a like-new hand-me-down from a gal in my Bible study. I've always wanted one and I love this style of comforter. We do have a couple of other nice bed quilts that are hand-made that we can use to change the look of our room. White isn't the best for having little ones around and for a hubby with a dusty job, but at least white brightens up a very dark room.

On King Jo's nightstand: A picture of us on our wedding day and a small alarm clock.

King Jo's dresser was stacked high with junk, papers, and snowmobile helmets. I cleaned and straightened it and put the helmets in the closet (which is to the left of this dresser and has closing doors).

This pretty autumn swag was $1 or less at a yard sale this summer. It adds a homey touch to my side of the room.

I've always enjoyed photography, and like Heather, enjoy decorating with it to personalize the room. A pic of King Jo washing my feet on our wedding day reminds us to serve one another in our marriage.

What's next?

I'd like to copy Heather's idea of framing some verses from Song of Songs to add to the walls. Eventually I will refinish the two old junky dressers and paint them a pretty color. If we see some satiny sheets on clearance around Christmas time we will buy them as we only have cotton sheets and they are getting very threadbare.

When we have a home of our own, I can't wait to choose paint colors and coordinate curtains! My friend Shiloh recently got to do that, in remodeling the home they bought, and she has a pretty caramel-colored room with cream trim.

*The log furniture was a wedding gift as my dad is a log furniture builder.

An En Gedi Bedroom--Guest Post

Here is the guest post I promised you, brought to you by the lovely Miss Heather H. of http://www.blessyourfamily.net/

Our Bedroom Re-decorating Project

Last summer I was inspired to give my husband, Jacob, a space of his own, with none of the pink-and-flowers of the rest of the house—a room that reflected Jacob’s own style. With two lovely daughters in our family, we females outnumber him 3 to 1, so I figured he needed a manly “hideaway!"
Excited to be able to decorate a room “from scratch,” I found a bamboo placemat on clearance for $1 and built a theme around it, choosing chocolate brown and dark green colors to coordinate. By the time our master bedroom was finished, we transformed it from a cluttery catch-all room with a too-short quilt and mismatched everything, to exactly what we wanted.

Here’s a peek:

(Now that we’ve moved away from this little home, I find that I took far fewer pictures than I’d thought. Still, I hope you enjoy the few shared here.)



Our bedroom transformation involved many changes:


Painting: We found the exact shade we wanted in a friend’s house and made a dramatic difference for under $25. (That doesn’t include the first gallon of paint I bought, which I realized was the WRONG color when we started painting the walls! My gracious husband agreed to let me purchase another gallon to fix my little mistake.) A friend helped us add wide pine trim around windows, closet, and doors, which we painted shiny black for contrast.

Carpeting: The original carpeting was in sorry shape, so we replaced it with a new roll of carpet that went very nicely with our theme. Our landlord had already purchased it brand-new, so this step didn’t cost us a thing. A friend taught us to lay carpet—another skill under our belt!
Window treatments: The pink-and-lilac gingham curtains I’d sewn early in our marriage weren’t exactly Jacob’s style, but they served their purpose for the first six years. However, replacing them with bamboo shades made an amazing difference.



Furniture: We added a black oriental-style nightstand, a black trunk, a floor lamp, and replaced our bedroom fixture with one that had an amber-colored shade. Another friend pitched in and wired the new fixture into the wall.

The piece de resistance of our new room is a vintage dresser that underwent an amazing transformation:

Before: In my parent's basement

After: In our new room

The dresser was my dad’s as a child. Having this redone was my parents’ Christmas gift to us!

Bedding: We scored a great deal on green satiny sheets at a JCPenney clearance, and got fabrics 40 to 50% off at Jo-Ann to make our quilt. A friend who makes pillows professionally volunteered to sew us four throw pillows. The striped ones have a coordinating fabric on the reverse, so I can change the look by flipping them to the other side. My friend Kate, who helped us a lot with our project, found a garage-sale bamboo mat that became our headboard.

Personalized art: I framed pictures of us together for the nightstand, and included Song of Songs 2:16, I am my beloved’s and he is mine.

We also planned to hang a wrought-iron triquetra on the wall, a Celtic symbol of the trinity. Since we weren’t able to have one made, I’m planning to make a triquetra on a fabric banner instead.

After the room was decorated, there were still a few remaining tasks to make the bedroom a retreat, which I’d love to share with you:

Make the bed daily: Take just a few minutes to do this in the morning. It changes the feel of the room from disorganized to comforting.

Keep it picked up: Even if you have to creatively stash things in other rooms, do it. Or get a classy-looking trunk to hide it away. It’s hard to relax in a cluttery room!

Relax in your new room together. Don’t save your room for those few minutes before you fall asleep. “Retire” to your room half an hour before bedtime. Read together. Get a book on marriage or intimacy and keep it in your nightstand. Talk about the day together. Make it your place to get refreshed and connect with each other at the end of a long day.

We love our new room. After six years of marriage, it was good to do something to focus on our relationship again (especially since we’re the busy parents of young children!) Jacob told me today that when life gets crazy, it’s nice to have a place that makes you calm and relaxed just by entering the room. "Yay!" I told myself. "It worked!"

Heather blogs at http://www.blessyourfamily.net/

She is the mother of Kardelen (almost 3) and Sofia (17 months). She enjoys baking, decorating her home, simplifying, natural living, crafts, educating preschoolers, teaching piano, being frugal, and bargain shopping.

Note from Mrs. Jo: Heather's work inspired me to make my bedroom more of a haven, even if we are still in a rental. I'll post pics tomorrow of our newly organized bedroom!

Being His En Gedi in Your Appearance

My recent series on being your husband's En Gedi (oasis of rest/haven) has covered attitude, food, friendship/affection, sex, and homemaking. Now we move on to our appearance. Before we were married we probably spent a lot of time fixing up and making sure we looked our best for our special guy. But something happens after we have kids and can barely stumble out of bed in the morning and can barely find time for a shower or to use the restroom.

How can we please our husbands in our appearance if we don't have a lot of time and energy for grooming?

Well, first of all, I think you should know that you don't have to look like "Miss Hollywood Celebrity" to be beautiful to your husband. He married you because he found you very attractive, so don't try to warp your mind into believing a lie; that you have to look like the world's standard of beauty. Women compare themselves constantly, and we have to discipline ourselves to stop doing that.

One of the best principles I have gained so far from the Mark Driscoll Song of Songs series is that your spouse should be your standard of beauty. I had never heard that concept before. This means before you are married, you should NOT have a standard of beauty because you don't know who God is going to bring across your path and lead you to marry. Once you are married, your spouse is your standard. That means if your husband is tall, you like tall. If your wife is blonde, blonde is beautiful to you. If your husband was once slender but is now heavy, your standard has changed and before you liked slender but now you like heavy. This doesn't mean we can't encourage our spouses to be healthier, change their hairstyle, try a new hair color, etc. It just means that instead of comparing our spouse to the "hottest people in the world" we compare the world to our spouse, whom is always #1 on our Hottest List, as King Solomon did with his bride.

Knowing you are your husband's standard of beauty is very encouraging to a wife. You don't have to wish you looked differently or like so-and-so and don't have to try to be someone you are not. God made you special and your husband loves what God made! If we all looked the same life would be so boring!

What are some ways you can delight your husband with your appearance?

*Work on your inner beauty first because as I mentioned in the attitude post, outward beauty fades but inner beauty doesn't. Some of the prettiest women I have ever seen are those who have a quiet and gentle spirit and a strong faith in the Lord and yet wear very simple clothing.

*Make good hygiene a priority. Most women have no trouble in this area but I mention it just in case. Shower often, brush your teeth, shave your legs (unless your hubby is into the Nolsy look...)

*Dress modestly. There are guys out there who want their wives to dress seductively, but this is not right. (Proverbs 11:22 Like a gold ring in a pig's snout is a beautiful woman without discretion.) Christian women are to be modest and most husbands will appreciate you not showing what you've got to everyone else; it is to be exclusively his. Regularly ask his opinion on what is okay and what is not okay. Don't assume that all pants are okay or all high-necked shirts are okay because based on the tightness or the cut they may be somewhat immodest.

*Ask for his input. What outfits does he particularly like on you? What outfits doesn't he like? Some men won't have a lot of input, and others, like mine, will be more blunt, "That dress doesn't complement your body type." Sheesh, thanks! My husband really surprised me by mentioning he loved when I wore Carhardt jeans back in our college days. I haven't owned a pair in several years! Most people assume that my husband forces me to wear long dresses or skirts but the truth is that he loves seeing me in blue jeans too!

*Find out what your best colors are. Ever read Color Me Beautiful? It is a great book for helping you find out which color season you are. Colors can make all the difference in the world. When I wear white I look positively sick. When I wear salmon or jade or turquoise my eyes look bigger and more sparkly and my skin has a healthy glow. Go here to learn more about your color season.

*Resolve to get dressed right away in the mornings. If you don't make this a priority and you have young kids, your day will get swallowed up and you'll be standing around in your pajamas at noon. I got tired of people coming to the door unexpectedly and having to run to find a bathrobe and being embarrassed that I was still not dressed. Since I've made it a habit to get dressed immediately and fix my hair immediately, I feel better about myself and seem to get more accomplished in a day (and am less caught-off-guard if friends drop by). If you work up a sweat exercising each morning, then exercise first, then shower and get dressed.

*Take 5 to beautify. Even if you have a newborn, you can spare 5 minutes for your appearance. Put the baby in the swing or in the Ergo and comb your hair neatly, brush your teeth, put in earrings if desired, dab on a little face powder and some lipstick and fix your bangs (if you have them). 5 minutes is better than nothing and your husband will appreciate it.

*Take care of your body. This one is really hard for us busy moms. It's not easy to find time to exercise, and hard not to resort to eating out of fatigue. We all know we should exercise more, eat less, and drink more water, but it can be hard to actually incorporate those disciplines into our lives. One thing that helps me is having accountability. In college I used to have a deal going with my friend Anna where we had to exercise 15 minutes a day or else we had to pay the "Mission Fund" $1 for every day we missed. Even though we were a thousand miles away, we were able to keep each other on track and I found that often those 15 minutes stretched into an hour of exercise and I felt so good and was in good shape. I've also done deals where I give up chocolate for a period of time in order to quit indulging myself. When we got a Brita filter for $2 thanks to great coupons, I was able to drink a LOT more water since it tasted so much better. If you have young kids, try incorporating exercise into time with them. We often go for stroller walks or go to the park. I've recently fallen in love with pilates and the kids love to try to do it with me every morning. It's worth taking a good vitamin each day as it helps boost energy and overall health.

*Honor your husband's preferences regarding your appearance. Does your favorite sweater bug him? Get rid of it. Does he wish you would grow your hair long? Do it! Does he prefer you not wear eye make-up? Toss it! Does he love lipstick, buy some!

*Make a list, either on paper, or in your mind of what clothes your husband likes on you, what kinds of clothing flatters your figure and what colors look great on you. Then, when you are bargain shopping and hit a great sale or hit the thrift store you can pick up clothes that will look attractive on you for hardly anything. You don't have to look frumpy just because you don't have any money. Just ask Justus. We've hardly spent anything on his clothing and he's wearing almost all-new outfits and mostly Baby Gap!

As daughters of the Lord we represent Him and we also represent our husbands and also our profession as homemakers. I don't want to bring shame to the Lord, to my husband, or to homemakers in general by running errands in grubby clothes and sweats with uncombed hair, looking like I've been through a war. Clothes don't make the woman and God does indeed look at the heart, but if our outward actions reflect what's in the heart, shouldn't Christian women be the most joyful, radiant, and lovely of women?

For more on this subject check out Passionate Homemakings' posts on "The Art of Being a Well-Dressed Wife."

Being His En Gedi--The Comforts of Home

A sign the kids and I made to thank Daddy for his hard work in providing for us.
King Jo loves breadsticks, so we made him a special heart-shaped one.

We've discussed being our husband's En Gedi in attitude, with food, with friendship and affection, and in bed. Now we turn to the little comforts of home. These little things may fit into some of the previous categories, but they are all a part of homemaking. Whether you work full-time, part-time or are at home full-time, the home is the sphere of the woman and building "home" is part of our role. This doesn't mean our husbands shouldn't ever help out or share household chores. But it does mean that part of our God-given role as the Helper/Completer of our husbands is to be the keeper of a home. Personally, I think this is great fun! Ever since I was a little girl I loved re-decorating or re-arranging my bedroom, organizing and simplifying my stuff, and making things "homey." If you've ever seen the contrast of a Girls Dorm and a Guys Dorm or a Bachelor Pad and an apartment full of gals you can see and smell that men and women are different in this area!

What are some ways we can bless our husbands in our homemaking and create a restful oasis (En Gedi) for him?

*Ask him for help and input in setting up the house. Some husbands, like mine, will really get into this and have an opinion on where the furniture should go, which decorations they like, etc. Some guys could care less and will turn all of the decisions over to you.

*Quiz your husband on favorite colors/styles/themes. If your husband is a sports fan and not a cowboy, it would make sense to not decorate the living room in cowboy/western paraphernalia. My dad is majorly obsessed with hunting. So, this means that their living room is covered with bear hides, moose and elk heads, beaver pelts, deer antlers, etc. My mom has a very Northwoodsy/Lodge decorating style which works well with their log home and log furniture. Personally, I hope to never have an animal head hanging on my wall!

*Don't be afraid of feminine touches but don't overdo. You don't have to make your house look like a grubby sports bar or a mountain lodge in order to be a good wife. I think most guys appreciate our little feminine touches, whether that be lovely smelling candles, eye-catching color combinations, flowing curtains, wreaths or baskets, etc. However, be careful not to go overboard with doilies, lace, flowers, etc. I know someone who painted her entire room a very girly color and has the same color for her comforter and pillows. Every time I see it I pity her poor husband, who is actually a pretty macho guy, because I just can't picture him liking such a girlish bedroom.

*Find out his pet peeves in matters of the home and work to prevent them from happening. If your husband is really bothered by little things like squeezing the toothpaste from the top or putting the toliet paper in the dispenser a certain way, you can show him love by catering to his wishes. If he can't stand to see toys on the floor have the kids pick up before he comes home for supper. I tend to get interrupted doing dishes each day before I'm completely done and since I always save silverware for last (since I hate it) sometimes we run out of clean silverware. My husband hates not having a clean spoon for breakfast so I'm making an effort to always do spoons first and that way they get done every day. Your husband may like his pants ironed, a fresh towel every day, or the table clear of all paper piles. By honoring his preferences, you are honoring him and I'm sure he will be blessed!

*Use your gifts and talents to make a beautiful home. Into photography? Frame some of your best photos. Into sewing? Sew pretty napkins and table runners/cloths. Do you collect things? Set up a pretty display of your collection. Use your skills with painting, home decorating, art, bargain-shopping, gardening, etc. to make your home a haven. There are lots of great blogs out there that highlight creative ways to decorate or beautify our homes. http://www.thehomespunheart.blogspot.com/ and http://www.likemerchantships.blogspot.com/ are two of my favorites.

*Simplify and Organize. Cut down on the amount of stuff you own and you will cut down on what you have to sort, clean, organize and manage. Most husbands won't complain about a de-cluttered and tidy home. However, make sure not to de-clutter his stuff without his permission =) After purging stuff, containerize the stuff that you do want to keep in order to stay organized. For us this meant buying several plastic tubs for various sizes of kids' clothes and for my crafting/sewing/scrapbooking supplies and gift stash. Always be on the lookout for containers that can help organize your junk. Boxes, trunks, baskets, tubs, buckets, drawers, dressers, shelves, etc.

*Clean your home on a regular basis. Easier said than done, right? Any husband who has spent a day (or even an hour) home with the kids knows that perfection isn't possible and he won't expect your home to look like a spread in Better Homes and Gardens. However, having an inch of mold caking the rim of the tub, or having so much dust in the house that your husband's allergies go beserk won't exactly spell En Gedi to him. There are seasons of life where cleaning takes a backseat (pregnancy, having a newborn, sick kids, surgery, etc.) but overall, keeping the home reasonably clean and neat should be a priority. I have tried the index card system and the binder system for home management and both of them work very well! Find a system that works for you to help you keep up with the housework.

What are some ways you bless your husband through your homemaking?

Stay tuned for a guest post later this week by one of my talented friends who made her bedroom a beautiful haven.

Being His En Gedi in Bed

Our first kiss on the lips at the altar on our wedding day. We practiced the dip, without the kiss, beforehand. It was well worth the long wait!

If you were hoping for something juicy you will be disappointed! I'm not going into detail on this one (after all, my Grandma, my mother-in-law, my brother, and our youth pastor read this blog and there are some things that shouldn't be shared!) but I will provide you with some very good links to sermons/talks on this subject. Meeting your husbands' sexual needs is biblical (1 Cor. 7:3-5) and a great way to refresh and encourage him and provide him with En Gedi (Song of Solomon 7:3-5).




Listen to Carolyn Mahaney's gracious talk, "Sex, Romance, and the Glory of God: What Every Christian Wife Needs to Know." She covers Grade A Passion using the 5 A's: Being attractive, available, anticipatory, agressive, and adventurous.





Yet again I will put a plug in for Mark Driscoll's series on the Song of Solomon, "The Peasant Princess."





Some questions from Driscoll to discuss as a couple:


On a scale of 1-10 how am I doing at loving you outside of the bedroom?


How can I do better?


On a scale of 1-10 how am I doing at loving you inside the bedroom?


How can I do better?





Other notes from Driscoll's sermons:


Sex IN MARRIAGE is for:


*pleasure


*unity


*comfort


*procreation


*spiritual warfare





Great Teaching on Sex:


The 2004 Desiring God National Conference "Sex and the Supremacy of Christ."





This area of marriage is an arena to learn to practice unselfishness. It would seem that in most couples I've heard of there is one person who tends to be more passionate than their spouse. Don't make the mistake of assuming this is always the man because many a wife suffers from deprivation. The spouse with greater desires has to learn to compromise by not demanding to be together as much as they'd like and the less passionate person has to find the oomph to be passionate a bit more than they'd prefer. As Driscoll says, "Marriage is not for our happiness, but our holiness."

If you are in the habit of depriving your husband, perhaps there are deeper issues that need to be solved. If your husband has a porn addiction or you have been abused in the past or you are hurting one another with your own selfishness outside of the bedroom then these things need to be dealt with in order for you to be En Gedi sexually for your husband.

If you struggle with fatigue in caring for young children Carolyn has some good advice in the talk I linked to above. One quote from her talk, "If the baby has kept you busy all day feed him peanut butter sandwiches for dinner and give him great sex afterwards, and he won't complain."

Sex is a very important part of creating En Gedi for your husband. Temptations abound in our world today and in taking care of his needs in this area you will find yourself blessed too and you will strengthen your marriage against the schemes of the devil.

Being His En Gedi through Friendship and Affection

Part of cultivating a restful place for our husbands to recharge and relax is to comfort them with friendship and affection also known as love. This can be difficult to remember if all day long there are little ones tugging at you and demanding help with everything. Remembering to treat your husband as you would like to be treated goes a long way. Here are some things that come to my mind that could show him you care. Some of this may fall under respect and some under love, but my husband wants both, and I'm sure yours does too!

*Happy countenance. Greet him with a smile and a warm welcome. Encourage the kids to get excited when Daddy comes home.

*Focus on him. Do your best to not be on the phone when your husband comes home or to not gab on the phone with friends all the time during the time he is home. Don't ignore him by being glued to the TV, the internet, your book (oops!), your cell phone, your Ipod, or even your kids.

*Peace and quiet. Give him a breather before you unload the frustrations of your day or mention weighty topics. Encourage the kids to be quiet and not tackle him unless that's waht he wants. Serious discussions are best done when the kids are in bed since they don't seem to handle being ignored very well!

*Touch. Give him hugs and kisses throughout the day to communicate your love for him.

Minister to him through massage. Especially for those of us whose husbands work their muscles unceasingly all day long, massage can be such a comfort and a help to them when they are weary and sore. We exchange at least 3 or 4 massages a week as I have a bad neck and he often has a sore back.

*Do things with him. Some guys love just being in the same room with their wives even if they are doing two separate things (like playing on the computer and reading). Some guys enjoy playing board games, watching a movie together, or reading books aloud together. Spend time together, even if it's just getting different projects accomplished while in the same area of the house.

*Sharing in his hobbies. Take an interest in what he likes. This is probably the hardest thing for me as my husband really likes listening to music and I would much rather listen to theological debates or sermons all day long. I enjoy music and we both listen to Christian music, but we don't share the same passion for it and I don't like most of the same bands he does. So, if I sat down with him and asked him to show me some audio clips of some new bands he likes, he'd be in "Hog Heaven" (whatever that means!) We do enjoy singing worship songs together as a family when he pulls out his guitar and plays. My sister-in-law is a good example of this principle in that she actually sits down and watches videos of how to put an engine together with her mechanic husband. Some women curl up on the couch with their hubbies for a football or basketball game.

*Words of affirmation. My husband really enjoys verbal expressions of love throughout the day. I can tend to forget this and be like those guys who say, "Why should I tell ya I luv ya? I told ya at the altar and nothing has changed!" I've made an effort to be more expressive in this area and tell him I love him several times a day.

*Gifts. If your husband really appreciates little gifts, leave little cards or surprises for him in his office, lunch box, or dresser drawers. Buy him little things, and, if you can swing it, a big thing now and then to show him how much you care and how much he was on your mind.

*Listen. This is HUGE! Listen, listen, listen!!! It's not always easy and sometimes our brains want to be thinking about other things instead of listening to our husbands talk in vivid detail about the inner workings of our vehicles or the big hunt they went on but it shows respect and love to him if we can give our husbands our full attention. We listen to our girlfriends and we want to be listened to so we should be listeners too.

*Kind words. Who wants to come home to a biting, sarcastic wife who puts her husband down or makes jokes at his expense? It's okay to laugh with him over stuff, but if you are nagging, nasty, crass, or rude, you aren't providing your husband with a retreat from the harsh world.

*Don't treat him like a servant. It's shocking how many wives do this. They forget that their God-given design was to be a helper and a completer to the man and instead enjoy being the boss. We don't nag our friends or expect them to cater to our every whim so we ought not to treat our husbands that way either. It's fine to ask for help but do so with a gentle attitude and not as a Drill Sergeant.

*Speak well of him. Praise him in front of others (without being sickeningly sweet and annoying) and spread good gossip about him whenever you have the chance. Refuse to fall into the peer pressure of dissing on your husband or all guys in general even if all of your girlfriends are doing so.

*Talk! Share your own heart with him and be vulnerable. When a couple isn't spending time talking, it can be easy to drift apart. While you may not ever again have 6-hour marathon chats like you did during the courting/engagement stages, it's still important to have time to talk without interruptions and share your concerns, your fears, your joys, your plans, etc. To have a successful and deep friendship you must be willing to give of yourself through honest communication.

Did I miss anything here? I'd love to hear your thoughts on this topic. I definitely don't claim to be an expert or be perfect in all of these things that I am highlighting in my En Gedi posts. I have studied a ton of books on biblical marriage and I do have an amazing marriage that is beyond what I could have ever dreamed possible. These tips in my "Being His En Gedi" posts are by no means exhaustive but I share them because they truly do aid in having a wonderful marriage. I welcome your input here too! Many of the ideas in this post were taken from "The 5 Love Languages" by Gary Chapman.

Check out the previous two posts on this series:

Being His En Gedi

Being His En Gedi with Food

(Tomorrow's post will cover Being His En Gedi in Bed...)

Being His En Gedi with Food

In my first post on Being His En Gedi, I talked about how it all starts with a good attitude! Now, we will move on to food. What man doesn't thoroughly enjoy good things to eat? My husband has always said that if I threw a bag of Doritos on the table and called it dinner, he would be happy. He's not picky and doesn't complain. However, he does enjoy vegetables and whole-grain breads and having a good diet. He also really enjoys when I make a special effort to make something he is especially fond of! Here are some ways that I have tried to be En Gedi to my husband in the area of food:

*I don't make things he doesn't like. This has always been very simple for me since he's not picky and usually eats anything and is okay with trying new things. I honestly can't think of anything offhand that he truly doesn't like (except maybe saurkraut and I don't like it either) and so I don't have to worry too much about this. My mother-in-law has been a great example in this area in that she doesn't bring onions, garlic, popcorn, or spicey things into the house as my father-in-law can't bear the smell. Even though she would really like to cook with those things, she doesn't for his sake.

*In general, try to make things he especially likes. I don't enjoy hotdogs but always make sure to get some of his favorite kind throughout the summer to throw on the grill. For the most part we like the same foods and so we eat a lot of our favorites often.

*Special Spoiling. Every now and then I do "Spoil Hubby" week where I plan 7 days worth of his favorite meals and desserts. He loves it! Why don't I make every night a Spoil Hubby night? Well, because we're on a budget, I can't always buy the ingredients for his all-time favorites, and because of the pace of life, I can't whip up a pumpkin pie every day (and that wouldn't be great for our waistlines either!) Spoil Hubby week is a lot like eating out at a restaurant for a week straight, so it's more fun if it's rare and something he can anticipate!

*Snacks on hand. Snacks seem to evaporate into thin air around here because my kids are big snackers and my husband has a metabolism that burns about twice as much as the average male (or so it seems!) When King Jo is home, he's snacking every hour or two, and yet he hasn't gained a pound in 10 years! If I want his home to be a place of refreshment and delight for him, I know to keep these things on hand: honey roasted peanuts, saltine crackers, pears, apples, granola bars, Doritos, homemade peanut butter cookies, muffins or homemade bread, olives, jalapenos or pickles, tortilla chips and Pace salsa, and especially ICE-CREAM!!!

*Meals: My hubby gets up first and usually helps the kids get breakfast so that is a blessing. He's totally not a cooked-breakfast type of guy so a bowl of cereal is what he prefers (and hey, I don't mind sleeping in a bit!) Four out of five days a week he comes home for lunch and so I try to always have leftovers ready or something cooked up for lunch when he gets home. I love having him come home for lunch and the kids do too so I want to feed him well so he continues to do so and doesn't have to become a grab-lunch-at-McD's kind of guy (which is both expensive and unhealthy!) My goal is to always have dinner ready or almost ready when he gets home. There are rare occasions where we have been running errands or had something special going on where this doesn't happen, but normally I do because I always think about how hungry I would be if I was lifting house logs all day in the scorching sun. I usually ask him what time he will be home for supper before he leaves home on his lunch break, since it varies a little bit from day to day.

*Packed lunches: I used to have to pack lunches for King Jo every day when we were first married. For the first year of our newlywedded bliss I would put little love notes in his lunch each day. The guys at the lube place where he worked got such a kick out of his daily notes. Currently, my hubby only needs one packed lunch a week as he spends one lunch hour each week playing guitar with his buddy/accountability partner at our church. If he goes logging for work, which they do about once a week during the fall, I try to pack a very hearty lunch with lots of energy-boosting nutrients and some Gatorade or Propel as they are often working 12 or more hours on those days. I find that due to my hubby's early mornings and my zombie-like state in the morning I prefer to pack lunches the night before. I still try to do notes now and then to let him know how much we all appreciate his back-breaking labors.

I love to cook and have a lot of fun baking up desserts or bread or experimenting with new recipes. Of course, the reality is that it is a lot harder to cook with three little ones in our current stage of life. It takes planning ahead by mapping out meals and making a shopping list and trying to get all of the grocery shopping done once a week. During my morning sickness stages, my hubby has had to endure a lot of fast-food, sandwiches, and frozen dinners. If all of the kids are having a rough day or we've had lots of errands to run, meals around here are very simple. But, I am thankful for the way God has provided us with food/meals through the sweat of my husband's brow and want to bless him with good food!

Share your ideas on how you use food to make an En Gedi for your husband......

Being His En Gedi

One of the sermons I have listened to recently talks about how a wife can be En Gedi for her husband. I've heard this principle mentioned before in marriage books and have tried throughout our married life to make our home a place of peace and refreshment for my husband.

While I know my husband loves me no matter what and understands that life with 3 little ones can be chaotic, I still want to make an effort during this season of life to be and to maintain a place of refreshment for him. It's all too easy to just let life happen and let the kids' needs take precedence and if you don't proactively seek to build your marriage, you will find that it will naturally deteriorate. I don't want our lives to revolve around our kids and don't want our relationship to wither.

Making our home an En Gedi is easier said than done since our clean laundry seems to often flood the couch, toys often litter the floor, and our bedroom is cluttered due to lack of space and having to share it with Justus at night and Jeremiah during nap time. Of course I would love to have an enormous master bedroom with a patio overlooking the mountains, a hot tub or jacuzzi, and a cozy fireplace in front of a plush leather couch where we could retreat from the diapers and racecars and busy-ness of life. But since that isn't a reality right now, I have to figure out how to carve an En Gedi out of the things I do have.

Where it all starts:

I think making our homes and our bodies an En Gedi for our husbands starts with the attitude. What good is a spotless home if the wife in it is nagging/quarrelsome/easily angered? Maintaining an attitude of joy and greeting your hubby with a smile will bring him refreshment, even if the house looks like a tornado of junk hit!

Having an attitude of contentment and joy is only possible if one is cultivating a growing relationship with the Lord. "But let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious. " 1 Peter 3:4 Our outer beauty may pass away but inner beauty is unfading.

Daily giving ourselves to the Lord, seeking Him, reading His Word, and asking for His help, we can grow in the qualities that can make our homes an En Gedi.

Love

Joy
Peace

Patience

Kindness

Goodness

Faithfulness

Gentleness

Self-Control

Thankfulness

Contentment

Respect

Stay Tuned for Coming Posts on Being His En Gedi.......

Doing Good To Your Husband

Girl Talk has been doing a series on Doing Him Good in recent days, referring to blessing your husband. Check it out!


I've mentioned that I've been listening to Driscoll on Song of Solomon. Go here to listen to the series. This week's sermon (#5) is largely on selfishness and applies to both singles and marrieds. At first my husband wasn't too interested in listening to the sermons with me, but I began offering him a long back massage while I listened to them and he ended up loving the sermons too and it has given us lots to talk about.

A Small Tribute to My Husband

I say this is a small tribute because I don't have the time or space to share all the wonderful things about my husband in this post but I will share a few.

I honestly believe that my Josiah is the most wonderful husband on the earth for me. (I had to add that "for me" in there because I know many of you feel your husbands are the best on earth too!) It's like God hand-crafted him to be exactly the man I need to lead me, care for me, and challenge me in my walk with God.

He knows everything about me and still loves me, even when I look like death warmed over in the morning after an all-nighter with a baby or have tried to hurt him in anger with my words. He lovingly cares for and supports me in everything, from fears and worries, to trials and temptations. He is always kind, always forgiving, never harsh, never controlling and never lording his authority over me. He truly loves me, as best as a sinful human being can, as Christ loves the church.

A note to single girls out there: When it comes to evaluating a guy for husband-material don't look at the flashy, popular guys who are into themselves and into money and having the best. Don't desire a guy just because he's the star quarterback or because he drips with charm. Many of those guys come to ruin, or at the very least, aren't fun to be married to. The best quality you can look for in a husband is a man who loves the Lord and walks closely with Him and has a teachable and repentant heart. Sometimes these guys are really shy and quiet and don't stand out in a crowd. They may not have the coolest cars, or be able to afford the biggest diamond but they will love you with all of their heart because they love Jesus and follow Him. It's infinitely worth it to have a wonderful husband and a wonderful marriage than to chase after the things of the world and pick out a spouse based on the world's values. Among Christians, I have heard many a single gal say: "I want to marry a pastor or a missionary." While it's wonderful if God leads you into ministry with your spouse someday or brings a pastor-to-be a' courtin', don't overlook the guys who aren't in the ministry vocationally because having that position doesn't guarantee that a man has character or that marriage will be wonderful. We spent a summer of our marriage in missions and let me say it was very hard because of the travel and the constant work and needs. The ministry can be rough on a marriage if the husband doesn't work continually to keep his priorities in place.

So, look for a man who loves Jesus and follows Him and you will find it easy to respect and follow such a man.
I thank our Sovereign God for giving me such a man.