I have a glorious bunch of women friends. Many of you read my blog and have shared good times over Bible studies, craft nights, or long talks as roomies in college. I have friends of all shapes and sizes and personalities and each of you has contributed to my life and enriched it (yes, even those blogger friends I've never even met in real life!)
There have actually been friends whom I saw before I met and I just knew we would be friends. There have been many gals whom I wanted to get to know based on the fact that they were/are at the same stage of life as me or because we have a lot in common.
However, one of my dearest friendships took me completely by surprise.....
It all began when we finished our ministry internship and moved back to my hometown where my husband got a job working for my dad in carpentry. All of my high school friends had moved away and I was lonely. There were only about two young Christian couples our age in town that we knew of and one couple was moving away and the other was busy adjusting to life with newborn twins. (They are now dear friends of ours).
I'm not sure exactly how we became friends but somehow I was introduced to Amy at church and she invited me to go walking with her. She worked at the church and was well-known by all and had a son close to Ali's age. I was excited to have someone to do something with but I never imagined we would be close buddies or anything. After all, we're about as opposite as two people can get. She loathes pink and all things girly and I wear pink often. You might catch her in a dress once a year, at Easter, and I wear mostly dresses and long skirts. Her idea of a dream vacation is biking across the state of Wisconsin every summer (70 miles a day) where mine involves a lot more laying around and reading. She was the ultimate laid-back and relaxed parent and I was the hyper-overly-paranoid-and-protective first-time mom. She doesn't mind if the kids have sticky hands or eat ice-cream cones in the living room whereas I just can't handle sticky hands. She pushes herself to get up at 5 and lift weights at the gym and I am not too chipper in the morning. We are over a decade apart in age and our husbands have pretty much nothing in common. She's a pet person and I'm not. Though we haven't discussed much theology in the last couple of years I'm pretty sure we have very different viewpoints. We have different views/lifestyles when it comes to most of the "hot button" issues.
So, if anyone seemed like someone I WOULDN'T end up being good friends with, it was Amy. But we enjoyed our walks together and swapped mommy tips and recipes and enjoyed having our kids romp around together. Pretty soon we both got to thinking about Baby #2 and lo and behold, ended up having Arianna and Jeremiah exactly 2 months apart.
We've spent countless hours at the park, swimming on Friday mornings, going to the lake, couponing, having pool parties, garage-saling (whoo-hoo!) and swapping babysitting. One of the best things about Amy is that she is there. She is never too busy and is usually the one to check in with me, and our other friends, to see what our plans are for the day.
Recently I've been reflecting on how much I have been blessed by her friendship. It has been so good for me to be around Amy and I have learned a lot from her wisdom. I don't have the corner on truth and it's been great for judgemental old me to have a flesh-and-blood friend who is so different to keep me balanced. Because of Amy, I have learned to be a more relaxed parent. I have been inspired by her example in the fact that she refrains from gossip and criticizing others. I have been blessed by the time she gives me because even though she works, she lives like a stay-at-home mom. She is always the first to visit someone in need or share what she has and never complains about how much work she has to do or that she isn't able to stay home like the rest of her friends. She ALWAYS remembers to brings snacks to the park and shares them with my kids and she is CONSTANTLY bringing over goodies that she baked or homemade salsa or meals when I was hugely pregnant. She volunteers in so many ministries at church and takes turns teaching my daughter's Sunday School class. I have witnessed her example of how to discipline in a calm and godly manner. I'll never forget the day she kept putting her son in time-out and mentioned she wouldn't be spanking that day. When I asked why she said that she knew she couldn't spank in love due to her irritation with her son so she was sticking with time-outs at the moment. She doesn't criticize her husband even if she doesn't always agree with his decisions.
I have learned how to be a better friend, a better mom, and a better wife from Amy's kind example. She is one of the most humble people I have ever met. Also, I'd be a lot chubbier without her always motivating me to go on walks with her. You should have seen how many miles we put on those strollers with our huge pregnant bellies!
There are few friends who I will let come in my house when it looks like a toy and clothes bomb exploded in it, but Amy is one of them! There are few friends whom I would confess my sins to, but Amy is one of them. There are few friends whom I would feel comfortable calling in the middle of the night, but Amy is one of them. There are few friends who understand the challenges of raising a highly energetic and stubborn child, but Amy does. There are few friends I call to babysit for fear of imposing on them, but I know I can call Amy if I really need a last-minute babysitter, even though her schedule is twice as packed as mine. There are few people I don't get offended at if they reprimand my kids. But if Amy corrects my children, I am grateful. There are few friends I can talk about anything with, but Amy is one of them. There are few friends who will allow you to run your errands when you're walking together (one memorable moment was when Ali shoved Elijah into the video racks at the video store and about 100 video cases came tumbling down....) There are few friends who have seen my mommy panic or seen me screaming at my kid (Ali and Elijah have this thing for riding bikes in the middle of the street when a car is coming while we are on walks.....). How many friends would cheerfully go to the swimming pool with me on foot when we had 7 kids age 4 and under between us (she was babysitting our friends' twins)? There are not very many friends whom I feel comfortable going into their house to drop something off when they are gone, but I have no fears about that with Amy. There are hardly any people on earth that don't try to win you to their way of thinking on a certain topic, but Amy never does. She keeps her arms wide open to people and doesn't pry or try to convince me out of my own convictions. She is brave, smart, energetic and friendly and a good listener.
Amy loves God with all of her heart and seeks to serve Him and serve others at all times. I praise the Lord for her and her friendship! I always thought the best friends were made in college when you had more time to talk and get to know each other. However, I have found that over time, even the fragmented conversations amidst burping the babies and disciplining the toddlers can forge a treasured friendship.
I wrote this to encourage all of you not to be scared to develop friendships with people God brings into your path who don't seem like your type. Don't get me wrong, I do enjoy my friends in long skirts who homeschool, don't have TV, and love pink! But I also enjoy my friendships with gals who are different than myself!
*One more thing: Amy introduced me to the best cookie on earth (I call them Double Chocolate Oaties) and she often brings some over when she bakes them!
There have actually been friends whom I saw before I met and I just knew we would be friends. There have been many gals whom I wanted to get to know based on the fact that they were/are at the same stage of life as me or because we have a lot in common.
However, one of my dearest friendships took me completely by surprise.....
It all began when we finished our ministry internship and moved back to my hometown where my husband got a job working for my dad in carpentry. All of my high school friends had moved away and I was lonely. There were only about two young Christian couples our age in town that we knew of and one couple was moving away and the other was busy adjusting to life with newborn twins. (They are now dear friends of ours).
I'm not sure exactly how we became friends but somehow I was introduced to Amy at church and she invited me to go walking with her. She worked at the church and was well-known by all and had a son close to Ali's age. I was excited to have someone to do something with but I never imagined we would be close buddies or anything. After all, we're about as opposite as two people can get. She loathes pink and all things girly and I wear pink often. You might catch her in a dress once a year, at Easter, and I wear mostly dresses and long skirts. Her idea of a dream vacation is biking across the state of Wisconsin every summer (70 miles a day) where mine involves a lot more laying around and reading. She was the ultimate laid-back and relaxed parent and I was the hyper-overly-paranoid-and-protective first-time mom. She doesn't mind if the kids have sticky hands or eat ice-cream cones in the living room whereas I just can't handle sticky hands. She pushes herself to get up at 5 and lift weights at the gym and I am not too chipper in the morning. We are over a decade apart in age and our husbands have pretty much nothing in common. She's a pet person and I'm not. Though we haven't discussed much theology in the last couple of years I'm pretty sure we have very different viewpoints. We have different views/lifestyles when it comes to most of the "hot button" issues.
So, if anyone seemed like someone I WOULDN'T end up being good friends with, it was Amy. But we enjoyed our walks together and swapped mommy tips and recipes and enjoyed having our kids romp around together. Pretty soon we both got to thinking about Baby #2 and lo and behold, ended up having Arianna and Jeremiah exactly 2 months apart.
We've spent countless hours at the park, swimming on Friday mornings, going to the lake, couponing, having pool parties, garage-saling (whoo-hoo!) and swapping babysitting. One of the best things about Amy is that she is there. She is never too busy and is usually the one to check in with me, and our other friends, to see what our plans are for the day.
Recently I've been reflecting on how much I have been blessed by her friendship. It has been so good for me to be around Amy and I have learned a lot from her wisdom. I don't have the corner on truth and it's been great for judgemental old me to have a flesh-and-blood friend who is so different to keep me balanced. Because of Amy, I have learned to be a more relaxed parent. I have been inspired by her example in the fact that she refrains from gossip and criticizing others. I have been blessed by the time she gives me because even though she works, she lives like a stay-at-home mom. She is always the first to visit someone in need or share what she has and never complains about how much work she has to do or that she isn't able to stay home like the rest of her friends. She ALWAYS remembers to brings snacks to the park and shares them with my kids and she is CONSTANTLY bringing over goodies that she baked or homemade salsa or meals when I was hugely pregnant. She volunteers in so many ministries at church and takes turns teaching my daughter's Sunday School class. I have witnessed her example of how to discipline in a calm and godly manner. I'll never forget the day she kept putting her son in time-out and mentioned she wouldn't be spanking that day. When I asked why she said that she knew she couldn't spank in love due to her irritation with her son so she was sticking with time-outs at the moment. She doesn't criticize her husband even if she doesn't always agree with his decisions.
I have learned how to be a better friend, a better mom, and a better wife from Amy's kind example. She is one of the most humble people I have ever met. Also, I'd be a lot chubbier without her always motivating me to go on walks with her. You should have seen how many miles we put on those strollers with our huge pregnant bellies!
There are few friends who I will let come in my house when it looks like a toy and clothes bomb exploded in it, but Amy is one of them! There are few friends whom I would confess my sins to, but Amy is one of them. There are few friends whom I would feel comfortable calling in the middle of the night, but Amy is one of them. There are few friends who understand the challenges of raising a highly energetic and stubborn child, but Amy does. There are few friends I call to babysit for fear of imposing on them, but I know I can call Amy if I really need a last-minute babysitter, even though her schedule is twice as packed as mine. There are few people I don't get offended at if they reprimand my kids. But if Amy corrects my children, I am grateful. There are few friends I can talk about anything with, but Amy is one of them. There are few friends who will allow you to run your errands when you're walking together (one memorable moment was when Ali shoved Elijah into the video racks at the video store and about 100 video cases came tumbling down....) There are few friends who have seen my mommy panic or seen me screaming at my kid (Ali and Elijah have this thing for riding bikes in the middle of the street when a car is coming while we are on walks.....). How many friends would cheerfully go to the swimming pool with me on foot when we had 7 kids age 4 and under between us (she was babysitting our friends' twins)? There are not very many friends whom I feel comfortable going into their house to drop something off when they are gone, but I have no fears about that with Amy. There are hardly any people on earth that don't try to win you to their way of thinking on a certain topic, but Amy never does. She keeps her arms wide open to people and doesn't pry or try to convince me out of my own convictions. She is brave, smart, energetic and friendly and a good listener.
Amy loves God with all of her heart and seeks to serve Him and serve others at all times. I praise the Lord for her and her friendship! I always thought the best friends were made in college when you had more time to talk and get to know each other. However, I have found that over time, even the fragmented conversations amidst burping the babies and disciplining the toddlers can forge a treasured friendship.
I wrote this to encourage all of you not to be scared to develop friendships with people God brings into your path who don't seem like your type. Don't get me wrong, I do enjoy my friends in long skirts who homeschool, don't have TV, and love pink! But I also enjoy my friendships with gals who are different than myself!
*One more thing: Amy introduced me to the best cookie on earth (I call them Double Chocolate Oaties) and she often brings some over when she bakes them!
3 comments:
Thanks for the post Lindsey. I appreciate the reminder about how it can be a blessing to have friendships with people who are different than myself. Sometimes I feel myself holding back from digging deeper in potential friendships because we just seem so different...
Thank you for your thoughts and insight!
Hope you have a blessed day!
What a blessing for God to have given you such a friend!
Your sweet post brings up a really important point: how others in our life change us. I've been thinking about this lately, too, and appreciate you talking about it.
May the Lord bless Amy richly for all her love to your family!
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