Being His En Gedi--The Comforts of Home

A sign the kids and I made to thank Daddy for his hard work in providing for us.
King Jo loves breadsticks, so we made him a special heart-shaped one.

We've discussed being our husband's En Gedi in attitude, with food, with friendship and affection, and in bed. Now we turn to the little comforts of home. These little things may fit into some of the previous categories, but they are all a part of homemaking. Whether you work full-time, part-time or are at home full-time, the home is the sphere of the woman and building "home" is part of our role. This doesn't mean our husbands shouldn't ever help out or share household chores. But it does mean that part of our God-given role as the Helper/Completer of our husbands is to be the keeper of a home. Personally, I think this is great fun! Ever since I was a little girl I loved re-decorating or re-arranging my bedroom, organizing and simplifying my stuff, and making things "homey." If you've ever seen the contrast of a Girls Dorm and a Guys Dorm or a Bachelor Pad and an apartment full of gals you can see and smell that men and women are different in this area!

What are some ways we can bless our husbands in our homemaking and create a restful oasis (En Gedi) for him?

*Ask him for help and input in setting up the house. Some husbands, like mine, will really get into this and have an opinion on where the furniture should go, which decorations they like, etc. Some guys could care less and will turn all of the decisions over to you.

*Quiz your husband on favorite colors/styles/themes. If your husband is a sports fan and not a cowboy, it would make sense to not decorate the living room in cowboy/western paraphernalia. My dad is majorly obsessed with hunting. So, this means that their living room is covered with bear hides, moose and elk heads, beaver pelts, deer antlers, etc. My mom has a very Northwoodsy/Lodge decorating style which works well with their log home and log furniture. Personally, I hope to never have an animal head hanging on my wall!

*Don't be afraid of feminine touches but don't overdo. You don't have to make your house look like a grubby sports bar or a mountain lodge in order to be a good wife. I think most guys appreciate our little feminine touches, whether that be lovely smelling candles, eye-catching color combinations, flowing curtains, wreaths or baskets, etc. However, be careful not to go overboard with doilies, lace, flowers, etc. I know someone who painted her entire room a very girly color and has the same color for her comforter and pillows. Every time I see it I pity her poor husband, who is actually a pretty macho guy, because I just can't picture him liking such a girlish bedroom.

*Find out his pet peeves in matters of the home and work to prevent them from happening. If your husband is really bothered by little things like squeezing the toothpaste from the top or putting the toliet paper in the dispenser a certain way, you can show him love by catering to his wishes. If he can't stand to see toys on the floor have the kids pick up before he comes home for supper. I tend to get interrupted doing dishes each day before I'm completely done and since I always save silverware for last (since I hate it) sometimes we run out of clean silverware. My husband hates not having a clean spoon for breakfast so I'm making an effort to always do spoons first and that way they get done every day. Your husband may like his pants ironed, a fresh towel every day, or the table clear of all paper piles. By honoring his preferences, you are honoring him and I'm sure he will be blessed!

*Use your gifts and talents to make a beautiful home. Into photography? Frame some of your best photos. Into sewing? Sew pretty napkins and table runners/cloths. Do you collect things? Set up a pretty display of your collection. Use your skills with painting, home decorating, art, bargain-shopping, gardening, etc. to make your home a haven. There are lots of great blogs out there that highlight creative ways to decorate or beautify our homes. http://www.thehomespunheart.blogspot.com/ and http://www.likemerchantships.blogspot.com/ are two of my favorites.

*Simplify and Organize. Cut down on the amount of stuff you own and you will cut down on what you have to sort, clean, organize and manage. Most husbands won't complain about a de-cluttered and tidy home. However, make sure not to de-clutter his stuff without his permission =) After purging stuff, containerize the stuff that you do want to keep in order to stay organized. For us this meant buying several plastic tubs for various sizes of kids' clothes and for my crafting/sewing/scrapbooking supplies and gift stash. Always be on the lookout for containers that can help organize your junk. Boxes, trunks, baskets, tubs, buckets, drawers, dressers, shelves, etc.

*Clean your home on a regular basis. Easier said than done, right? Any husband who has spent a day (or even an hour) home with the kids knows that perfection isn't possible and he won't expect your home to look like a spread in Better Homes and Gardens. However, having an inch of mold caking the rim of the tub, or having so much dust in the house that your husband's allergies go beserk won't exactly spell En Gedi to him. There are seasons of life where cleaning takes a backseat (pregnancy, having a newborn, sick kids, surgery, etc.) but overall, keeping the home reasonably clean and neat should be a priority. I have tried the index card system and the binder system for home management and both of them work very well! Find a system that works for you to help you keep up with the housework.

What are some ways you bless your husband through your homemaking?

Stay tuned for a guest post later this week by one of my talented friends who made her bedroom a beautiful haven.